Circles!

So it has been a while since I have posted.  Funny how life gets busy like that.  In fact, that is exactly what has been on my mind lately.  I have noticed patterns in life that just repeat over and over.  I remember when I was young I would wish for something new and exciting always being disappointed that I was getting the same events happening. 

Since changing my life style and becoming a man I have come to embrace this idea of life's circles.  The part I think I have embraced the most is the fact that times will get down.  I think I have figured out how to weather that storm better now.  There is a story that I read the other day that never hit me before.  The story of the Apostles out in the water and "I'm on a boat".  Being in a sea where a storm can come in and sink the boat or the sea be as clear as glass.  Both will happen if you just wait long enough.  Peter, like me, looks out and sees the Savior.  Here is the part that I have learned.  HE CALLS OUT TO HIM.  Being invited to join the Savior on the water Peter uses his faith and jumps in. 

Funny how so many times in my life I see the Savior out in the distance and I don't call out to him.  My instant thought is "I got this".  I feel that too many times I try to do things on my own.  I may call out people for being independent but I am worse at it than anyone I know.  I am learning to call out to Him when the sea is stormy AND when its calm.  This is the part of the circle that I didn't impement in my life before. 

One of my biggest examples has been my cousin Dave.  He is my big brother in every way.  He has called me when I needed it most and I know I could rely on him for anything if I need it.  If it wasn't for his example to me I wouldn't be where I am today.  If I owed my testimony and strength in the church to someone it would be him.  If someone that is so not perfect can have a loving wife and kids who are just amazing then I can have it too.  He has been constant in how he has dealt with trials.  I know he has struggled more than he has told me but he has admitted to me a few times where he has had it rough and those are the times I feel the most strength.  I need to admit to my Savior when I am struggling.  Instead of just saying "I got this".  As Dave has shown me how great an imperfect big brother can be I have a perfect big brother who is just waiting for me to call on Him. 

So to tie all this in, life doesn't change.  Its the same constant circle with the same oppourtunities to learn from.  The real change is only when we find a better way to handle all of the challenges life creates.  Of course here is a song that I have always liked.  Its by Incubus and its called Circles

You saw me lost and treading water,
I looked pathetic,
I looked as helpless as a stinger without a bee.
But underneath my presentation, (yeah.)
I knew the walls were coming down
and the stones that fell were aiming away from me.
Hey! What would it mean to you
to know that it'll come back around again?
Hey! Whatever it means to you,
know that everything moves in circles.
I saw you standing in my headlights. (Blink, blink, blink.)
I thought I'd run you down for the weight you left on me.
Instead I pushed rewind, reversed and drove away.
And seeing you disappear in my rearview brought to me the word 'Reciprocity!'

Hey! What would it mean to you
to know that it'll come back around again?
Hey! Whatever it means to you,
know that everything moves in circles.

Round and round we go...
who could've known it'd end so well?
We fall on and we fall off...
existential carousel.

Hey! What would it mean to you
to know that it'll come back around again?
Hey! Whatever it means to you,
know that everything moves in circles.